Featured Image: Some sort of beaded decoration I found while walking a trail in Rhode Island last weekend. Was tempted for a moment to take it, but it is where it belongs.
I was inspired a little while ago by a woman on TikTok who made a spreadsheet and graphs of all the dates she had been on.
And you know me. I love quantitative data. So obviously I made a spreadsheet.
Unfortunately, the data came up with nothing that necessarily helps me in finding out what I could do better in terms of dating. The location didn’t matter. How excited I was didn’t matter. How I met them didn’t matter. The data isn’t significant because I have had no “winners” to compare to. Even dates that went well, didn’t end well. No one became a boyfriend, and no one lasted more than eight weeks.
The data is at least kind of funny. And I don’t feel like writing this week, so here’s some sorta interesting data on all the dates I’ve been on since September 2018.
I do find this one kind of interesting because I thought I was relying too heavily on dating apps, but a third of my dates come from real life meetings. These obviously didn’t work out either, but they were more likely to become friends after.
I wholeheartedly believe that activity dates are better than any other kind of date. Especially when there’s some competition involved, like arcades, mini-golfing, bowling, et cetera. However, dates where drinking is involved (bar, restaurant), the conversation does flow easier.
(And yes, one guy just drove me around in his Mercedes. After hanging out five times, I asked him if he was looking to date, he said no. I asked if he was just looking for sex then, he said no. I asked him if he was just looking for a friend, he said no. I told him I don’t got time for that. About a week later he called me at 2am, drunk and crying that he missed me. I asked him what he wanted. He said he didn’t know. I hung up. He called me back a minute later asking for a ride home. I said no.)
This next one is about the approximate height of the man. These are, for the most part, educated guesses, as sometimes guys lie and I have to base how tall they are compared to my best friend who is 5’9.
The average height is 69.7 inches, which is an unsurprising 5’10.
This last one is how the relationship, or lack thereof, ended:
“No attraction” can be either physical or personality-wise. “Emotionally Unavailable” means they either didn’t know what they wanted, or just wanted sex. “Became Friends” means we decided we would be better off as platonic friends. “Mutual Ghost” is defined as when I don’t text them back and then they never text me again either.
So, most of the time, the connection just wasn’t there, and a handful of times it was unreciprocated.
Some other fun stats:
Average rating (as per this post’s rating system): 52*
*Only half the guys had spent enough time with me to be given a rating. Scores ranged from 37 to 62. Ideal rating is 70+
Average number of dates: 2.7*
*Six people only had 1 date.
Scale of 1-10, how attractive were they, average: 5.47*
*These scores ranged from a 3 to an 8.5 — just to prove to y’all that I’m going on dates with men from all across the attractive spectrum and it’s still not working lol.
Though, the ones that had no interest in dating me? Their average attractiveness was 7.25. So, I guess I’m not hot enough for 7+s, which is sort of fair because I consider myself a solid 6.5, maybe a 7 on a really good day. (Though, a few weeks ago, a guy told me I was a 9, which was very nice of him but he was definitely trying to sleep with me, so due to bias I cannot include that in my score.)